Friday, 11 February 2011

I'm so excited - like a Catherine Wheel

You'll see from my previous blog that I'm in a state of high excitement about the impending publication of our book Let's Talk Love. By the time I'd heard myself say "I'm sooo excited" a dozen times a day for a week, I sensed a pattern worth exploring. Time for a bit of self-modelling with Clean Language. And when I'm sooo excited, that's like what? Nothing. Absolute blank. Just an awareness that I was using a large blunt instrument to open an object of fragile beauty. So I went back to basics. Whereabouts is that excitement when it's sooo excited?' And my shoulders hunched up and the muscles of my face tightened as my eyes and mouth held in the feelings that seemed about to burst from me. Is there anything else? Yes, there's something around my head .... and something in my stomach .... and movement .... and a sense of spinning, yes spinning like a Catherine Wheel. Is there anything else about that Catherine Wheel? It's golden in the centre, like the sun and spinning around like a circular saw - lots of teeth. And from the teeth are droplets of golden fire, spinning off in all directions, until the Catherine Wheel slowly sputters and fizzles out. But wait, another Catherine Wheel has been lit .... and fizzles out .... and another .... and another. And when Catherine Wheel's are being lit, is there anything else about being lit? There's a hand with a taper and an arm with a thick outdoor coat. And now I'm pulling back and I can see all the person. It's me. Suddenly there's more and I light a rocket. What kind of rocket? It's harsh and direct and makes a loud, loud noise. People jump and draw in their breath. And people, whereabouts are people? Behind me. They're the audience. Some of them like the rocket - it's got a direct message: 'Here I am, you can't ignore me.' Some of them are uncomfortable, they don't like the big bang, so it's time for the star of the show. The big fireworks that lights up the sky in great balls of colour, that are formed of tiny, irridescent sparks that slowly fall to earth. Is there anything else about the big firework? Yes, there's about 150 sparks - each a little gem in its own right. And when there's a big firework and a rocket and a Catherine Wheel, is there anything else about all of that? It's time for the party - and I hand round mugs of hot chocolate and giant cookies. Everyone is talking about what they've seen. And what have they seen? Those who liked the rocket saw the banner attached to its tail - Let's Talk Love It's a link to the webpage that's advertising our book. Anything else? Yes, they're talking about the big rocket. That's the book itself. The big ball shapes are the chapters and the 150 sparks are the love statements that the book is all about. And when there's a party and fireworks and people, what happens next? I think Ill go and light another Catherine Wheel. I'm sooo excited..... ________________________ This self-modelling happened in the half hour before dawn when I should have been enjoying the last of a good night's sleep. Maybe I was helped by the dreamy state I was in, as my conscious mind didn't get too much in the way and my metaphor landscape unfolded quite easily. There was a point when the first Catherine Wheel sputtered and fizzled out that I thought I needed a better, different metaphor. As I cast around for something to fit the bill, I kept coming back to the Catherine Wheel and its picture as I looked at it kept getting clearer and brighter. So I stuck with the process... When the Catherine Wheel sputters and fizzles out, then what happens? and off I went again. I've been enjoying my excitement all day!

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